It Is Always Easier To Quit!

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Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the way that leads to life, and only a few find it.… – Matthew 7:13-14

A recent conversation with a friend caught me mulling over a point blank question, “How desperate are you for a breakthrough?…… It is your choice, and your choice determines the result.”

We all live each day with decisions to make, big or small, poor or wise, and our choices determine where we will end up in: each decision will result in either repercussions or blessings. 

Some of us hate to make choices; often vacillating between A and B, unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. Let’s face it- most of us love to take the easiest route, and it is a no brainer to make that choice. Why? Because it is always easier to quit than to continue, and it costs us less pain. Who doesn’t like the easy way out? 

SO,

we chose to cave in and give up, too readily and too easily. 

BUT,

if things come easy, do we need God?

AND,

The heart of the matter is often the matter of the heart.

 

The crux is, how desperate are you for a breakthrough? Here’s are some gauge you can find answers in:

  1. Are you griping, “Too tall an order I can’t do it. I am just a common man.”?
  2. Is your decision based on self and emotion or God and His direction?
  3. How many times have you pray about the situation in a day?
  4. 4. How many times have you consulted the Bible and the Great Teacher in the day
  5. How often do you humble yourself at your knees in seeking breakthrough?
  6. How willing are you to die to yourself?
  7. How willing are you to change yourself first than to change the situation?
  8. Have you exercise other sound options and try until something happens?
  9. Have you persevere until something happens?
  10. Do you prefer to settle for less?

 

Great men of suffering ever shared their experiences:

When God does an impossible task, the takes an individual and crushes him.

– Charles Swindoll

 

Until a man is nothing, God then can make nothing out of him.

– Martin Luther

 

Ever wonder, the greatest Glory awaits those who chose to persevere? Jesus persevered, at the point of death. If He didn’t, there is no Hope for mankind. Jesus is God, yes, but He was also 100% man, in the same skin as you and me.

I recalled the time I was in a health, Identity and financial crises, so broken from coming to the end of my tether, and desperately begging for a breakthrough that I literally chewed the Bible for any morsel of God’s living Word, day in and day out. As a newborn spiritual baby, I prayed like a mad woman not knowing how to fire with any spiritual gears bestowed. I just need to get out of my valley and get up on my feet. Was it easy? No. Was it quick? No. It took me a year (may be longer). Miracle happened because I chose to preserve, I made the choice to believe that God will bring me through it, and God didn’t waste my tears, my efforts to die to self and gut-wrenching pain. I didn’t give up then, so here I am, a living testimony of His Grace and amazing transformation. 

If I chose to give up then, I believe my life would have cost me more agony and landed me in more mess than before.

So it all boils down to your choice- Be wise.

Some of us may shrug at this devotion and brush it off “It is not applicable to me”. Let me submit to you that the Bible says in John 3:30, “Only when I decrease, so that God can increase”. Like it or not, we will all be tested- Brokenness is fundamental to restoration, and it is the only antidote to our self-centered nature.

 

When I am unable, God is Able;

When I am powerless, God empowers;

When I am faith-less, God is faithful;

Whenever I cringe in fear, God always stay near.

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How To Tip the Scale of Depression

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The way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know over what they stumble. – Proverbs 4:19 ESV

The recent spate of suicides by celebrities rendered me pensive that the world is getting darker, and darker… Many must had been in great emotional and mental turmoil that they could not overcome the lurking darkness that had gnawed relentlessly at their soul perpetually. How great must be that darkness! Indeed, even the bible warns that anxiety weighs down the heart (Proverbs 12:25) and hope deferred makes the heart sick (Proverbs 13:12). 

It is not unknown that the bible even recorded godly men have their fallen times and overtaken by darkness, one example can be found in Genesis 15:12, which reads, “Now when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and behold, terror and great darkness fell upon him.”

I can empathise to a certain extent since I once wrestled with the onset of mild depression. Given a pessimistic nature as a result of an unhealthy upbringing during childhood, I could anticipate gloom and doom whenever my soul was down-casted. 

“But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness! – Matthew 6:23

With no one at home to turn to nor able to share my struggles with whenever I needed help, I found it hard to trust people around me as I was taught that no one in the world was trustworthy. I was a loner, growing up with a belief system that if-no-one-can-help-me-only-I-can-help-myself. It was a sheer misery growing up that life in itself was meaningless. I painfully questioned my existence as I was lost in my own darkness and not knowing where I was heading… I could not recount the number of times I did contemplate (in my mind) to just end my miserable life, and that indelibly etched encounter with a speeding car which stopped on time at inches away from me, did jolt me up. It took me decades to surrender myself – I just need someone, whoever and whatever it was, to save me out of crises on all fronts- I was at the end of my tether then.

Thanks be to God, He drew me out of my deep water.

For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, – Colossians 1:13

Can you imagine that I used to be a super anti-Chirst, who cursed the God who gave me a rotten life (at that time). Such was a cynical and critical soul I was that I blatantly refuted the bible indisputably. Yet lo and behold, just because I took the first step in surrendering myself, on my humble knees desperately crying that I needed help. And miracles happened- my life was never the same since. I must say my conversion was very dramatic.

I had to expose the deeds of darkness so that I would not be held captive by them:

(a) Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them; – Ephesians 5:11 NASB

(b) But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light. – Ephesians 5:13 NASB

And because I had exposed them, I let Jesus into my life:

(a) The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. – John 1:5 NASB

(b) When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” – John 8:12

(c) This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. – 1 John 1:5

It is definitely no easy feat to come to the end of oneself to the point of total surrender. We can all be deceived or misled into thinking we are doing alright. The bible warns in 1 Corinthians 10:12 NLT, “If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall.”Luke 11:35 also reads, “Then watch out that the light in you is not darkness.”

Fears can also keep us from moving forward:

(a) Everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come into the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. – John 3:20

(b) And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul? – Matthew 16:26 NLT

(c) For even though they knew God, they did not honour Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened. – Romans 1:21 NASB

The critical step is to first acknowledge we have a problem and need help, and want to be helped. God will then take care of the rest if we are willing. Let God has the driver’s seat, He is far much better in steering our course and in control than us. Here I am, very thankful to God that I did not lose any ounce of my sanity. All I did was to stop being stiff-necked to wallow in my own self-pities parties any longer. There is no way I can stop wrestling with darkness until I let a glimmer of light in. 

P.S. In addition, I actually could not find answers to the vicissitudes of life in other religion at that time until I picked up the bible where I found Hope, Love, assurance, comfort, strength, wisdom and direction. Thereupon, it lays the foundation of living in Freedom, Truth and Light.

New Season. New Chapter. New Hope. RENEW.

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It has been 11 days into the new year- are we ready for the new season? R.E.N.E.W your resolution for the year:

R: RECHARGE your body, mind and soul

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from Your presence and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit. – Psalm 51:10-12

It is time to re-evaluate your life, recharge your body, renew your mind, reject lies and excuses, and refocus your priorities. Remember, our greatest glory lies not in never failing, but in rising up each time we fail; and it is always better to start somewhere than not at all; it is now or never.

E: EXPERIENCE God (again)

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” – Psalm 16:11

Nothing beats being in God’s Presence: the Source of true joy, renewed confidence, hope, strength, restoration, healing…… Seek Him continually, remember the wonders He has done, His miracles, and the judgments He pronounced. (Psalm 105:4-5)

N: NULLIFY the things that hold you ransom

“throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.” – Ephesians 4:22-23

Each passing year will leave behind some baggages, the more you hold on to them, the more they will get heavier and weigh you down. Hoarding junk is unhealthy, so get rid of the clutter, only then can you truly be liberated when you let go and let God.

E: EXERCISE your faith

“According to your faith it will be done to you!” – Matthew 9:29b

Faith is like muscle, the more you exercise to work out your muscle, the more it can be stretched, strengthened and hold well when tested.

W: WORK with God

“You will not succeed by your own strength or power but by My Spirit” – Zechariah 4:6

If you do what you always do, you will get what you have always gotten- working with fail finite strength will produce limited or barren result, but working with the Supernatural (with God) you will be where you never think possible.

The Pain Of Denial (Part 1)

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P.S. I will be sharing in parts as it will be too much to share at one time. I was prompted to share my convictions, and hope by sharing this entry in my own spiritual journal, it will bring illumination in a new light.

“If any man will come after me, let him (a) DENY himself, and (b) take up his cross DAILY, and follow me.” – Luke 9:23 KJV. 

We all have heard this verse far too many times. If we are honest, we also switch off many times. This has been the mandate of my previous cell at one time till a time it became alive to me– I went through a very difficult transition in my life two years ago when I was impacted with a physical condition, although not life-threatening, that a surgery could not fix and a healing miracle seemed implausible — Dashed dreams. Crushed hope. Wretched self. Menacing fears.

The first few weeks upon receiving the check-up report, I wasn’t able to worship in church– I was incapacitated to sing nor clap along. All in my mind was, “Why??” and “God, where are you?” My ex-G12 cell and my mentor had showered me with inordinate amount of concern, but I wasn’t grateful. I just wanted to be left alone as I justified the rights to my disappointments and lamely to confess my anger with God too. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to attend the weekly G12 meetings, and I even withdrew myself from the cell. But to my surprise, I couldn’t abandon my open cell that I had to lead every Friday. I still fulfilled my duty, shared the Word, and put on smiles (though I was struggling very badly as if a hypocrite).

Was I wearing a mask with my open cell? No. It was one method that helped me- “Deny myself.”

I couldn’t count the number of times “I didn’t FEEL up to it or FEEL like to”, “I didn’t WANT to…”, “I hate to be forced to…”, “I have the RIGHTS to…” I merely trying to cook up excuses as justified reasons. Till I came to a point that I realised I was actually very self-centered, very consumed with “I, me, myself” and very inwards-looking, focusing on myself only. I put my feelings and emotions before God as how I feel and what I want is more important than Him. It was a constant battle to deny, deny, deny, deny myself in the pit. It was even a scarier experience when I was enshrouded with darkness, alone, and found myself drifting away spiritually over six months. I was aware of such a downwards spiral, but I refused to yield as I was wrestling with God like Jacob. What really jolted me was- I began to lose myself while threading on a very thin tightrope, and any moment longer, I think I had tipped to the other side. That was unthinkably scary.

So how did I climb out of the pit, and back to the Cross? I have to simply keep denying myself daily, yes, EVERY DAY- deny my mood for the day, deny my emotions, deny my rights, deny my will, even to denying my convenience (my own time, my own pace, my own freedom…), and surrender to the Cross.

If we are honest with ourselves, it is by NATURE we follow what our flesh leads us. It is unnatural for us to contradict our flesh and that takes SUPERNATURAL intervention with the help of the Spirit. Aside to taking action to deny the self, we can draw reinforced strength from these verses:

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. – Galatians 5:16-17

For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot please God. – Romans 8:7-8

There is no change in my physical condition, but I had stopped asking all the whys because there will never be any answer- and who am I to question the Sovereignty? It was a decision whether to continue rotting by being my own god or to let go of all and let God be God. And letting go doesn’t mean to remain status quo. Just like bible says, “Faith without action is dead”, so I had to force myself since it is unnaturally of me to crucify my flesh to weaken its desires. It is simply to put to action in denying myself.

No doubt it is an uphill task because our flesh gets stronger when our Spirit is quenched by sins. It is a humbling experience to call upon God for help in this area.

So first thing first, get right with God. Face it honestly- Overcome it with God far easier and better than letting what consumed you and lose yourself.

Do You Know You Can Lose A Skill You Have Not Use For A Long Time?

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Always remember what you have learned. Your education is your life — guard it well. – Proverbs 4:13 GNT

Do you know that when you have not cycle for donkey’s years, you will lose the skill of cycling? Kid you not, I have not been cycling for 17 years, and to my horror, I now struggle balancing the bike! I reminisced how I used to cycle along the stretch of East Coast Park in my heyday, and loved speed. Not long ago, I picked up cycling, and it unnerved me. After rounds of flustering attempt, I finally managed to cycle a short distance.

P.S. How did I get going? I simply recalled how I first learnt cycling myself when I was in my adolescence, without any help nor affixing the bike with additional wheels.

Similarly, if we have not utilise our God-given talents or apply the knowledge we have picked up from the bible regularly, they can easily dematerialise.

Proverbs 19:8 (GNT) says, “Do yourself a favour and learn all you can; then remember what you learn and you will prosper.”

Therefore, do not take it for granted, it is to your own benefit to guard what you have learnt well- continual learning and application will keep you in good stead in your personal and spiritual life.

Can I Pray For You?

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Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. – Matthew 5:4

When I read the above verse, I was initially thinking, “Siao uh, how can one in mourning be called blessed? I think no amount of words would soothe a grieving spirit…” I recalled the few times when I struggled to pray as a result of a great disappointment with God. That was the darkest time of my life that I needed to go through somehow. Although I appreciated the comfort of friends who meant well when they offered encouragement, but the greatest comfort was the one who just be around me in silence (for there is a time to be silent and a time to speak. – Ecclesiastes 3:7B) and offered “Can I pray for you?” instead.

That was when I received the healing touch of the spirit ministering to my broken soul. Prayers are much more powerful in comforting and strengthening one’s inner self than mere words of encouragement. But of course I am not belittling those kind intentions, It is just that I experienced the stark difference when someone offered to pray for me instead.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. – James 5:16

Notwithstanding the form or level of comfort, we have a duty too to be a comforter to others.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble” – 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

We are blessed when we receive comfort from those whom God of all comfort has ministered to.

Keeping Secrets

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When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Finally, I confessed all my sins to You and stopped trying to hide my guilt.  I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.”  And You forgave me!  All my guilt is gone. – Psalm 32:3, 5 NLT

Sometimes I encounter friends who would share something with me but end up hushing me to keep them a secret. And I often wondered, if it is meant to be a secret, it is better not to share with me in case I may forget to honour my promise to retain confidentiality. Not only is it a burden to keep promises (because we may fail any time), it is also a burden to keep secrets, for fear of being found out one day if confidentiality is breached by careless and loose tongue.

I am thankful that having served as a former cell group leader had trained me to abide by “professional-spiritual” ethnics in protecting my cell members’ trust in me. And the bonus of shepherding a group had limited my capacity to remember so many things shared with me. Every time, I would feel burdened for them having to keep “secrets”, and I had witnessed how they wasted away with moans and groans all months (or even years) long, to the extent they are numbed and crushed. Like Psalm 38:8 in the bible warns, “I am benumbed and badly crushed; I groan because of the agitation of my heart.”

Whether secrets or not, we all will pay a price for sins or disobedience- even if we can fool men, but we cannot deceive God who can see or know every secret things in our lives.

Ah, you who hide deep from the Lord your counsel, whose deeds are in the dark, and who say, “Who sees us? Who knows us?” – Isaiah 29:15

And the more we try to hide, the more darkness will lurk in every corner of our soul., for our soul is not meant to ingest sin. At the end of the day, there will always be something gnawing inside us relentlessly.

The murderer arises at dawn; He kills the poor and the needy, And at night he is as a thief.  (Job 24:14). In the dark, thieves break into houses, but by day they shut themselves in; they want nothing to do with the light. (Job 24:26). Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. (John 3:20)

It is needless to suffer the miseries of unconfessed sins. Ephesians 5:11 exhorts to have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy. (Proverbs 28:13). If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9). Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. (James 5:16).

Remember, as the Chinese proverbs goes, “There is no paper that can contain a fire.”

Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord, – Acts 3:19